Every Man's Battle: Winning the War on Sexual Temptation One Victory at a Time (The Every Man Series) (Paperback) By Stephen Arterburn (Author) & Fred Stoeker (Author) Our Price $ 11.63   Retail Value $ 14.99   You Save $ 3.36  (22%)   Item Number 6252   Buy New Item Currently Out Of Stock

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	With this book, you may win the battle, but you'll probably lose the war  Dec 6, 2008
When I first read "Every Man's Battle", I had struggled with lust for a long time, and I thought I'd finally found a book that would help. In fact, I initially thought it HAD helped. But the more I put its advice into practice, the worse things got. The title--"every man's battle"--is wrong. It doesn't have to be every man's battle, and there are many men who don't struggle with this issue at all. (Not that anyone is above temptation, but I can testify that true freedom can be found without having an epic war with yourself every day.) I give this book two stars because I really appreciate how honest it is with many men's struggles. I think openness like this is needed if we are ever going to combat the problem of sexual impurity within the church. However, the methods this book recommends have many faulty presuppositions underlying them, and they will lead you astray. One of the key verses in this book is Job 31:1--"I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl." From this, the authors recommend the technique of "bouncing the eyes". In other words, whenever you find yourself noticing a woman's breasts, bounce the eyes. If you notice her hips, bounce the eys. Of if you notice her pretty face, bounce the eyes! I went through this book in a men's group at church. Initially, all the men seemed to find this technique helpful. But after a while, it really didn't work in rooting out lust. It became a chore that you had to constantly be on the alert, and I think it generally led to a fear of women, that their attractiveness could bring you to your knees in the slightest moment of weakness. Job 31:1 doesn't say, "I made a covenant not to look at all at a girl," but "I made a covenant not to look LUSTFULLY at a girl." There's a big difference. This book really fails to address the heart issue, and the beliefs behind those lustful looks. Oh, it emphasizes how bad lust and sexual impurity are. But it really doesn't offer any long-term solutions, aside from making you feel guilty about it. I finally found freedom in a little-known book entitled The Life That Wins by the Chinese evangelist, Watchman Nee. Rather than relying on your own works and eye-bouncing techniques, this book deals with sin as a whole--not just lust, but covetousness, envy, sinful anger, etc. God's solution to all sin is the cross. Negatively, the cross deals with sin, and positively, Christ is our righteousness. This book will take you through the steps to allow Christ to manifest Himself through you, so that "It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me" (Gal. 2:20). Then we know Christ as our righteousness (1 Cor. 1:30). After I began to experience real freedom, I realized that the whole attitude toward women in "Every Man's Battle" is unbiblical and ultimately destructive. The world says, "Women are an object of lust--indulge!" "Every Man's Battle" says, "Women are an ojbect of lust--supress!" How about viewing women as something better? How about viewing them as being created in God's image, deserving honor and respect? Philippians 4:8 says, "Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are *PURE*, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy--meditate on these things." This book only teaches you NOT to meditate on the bad things, but it gives you nothing good to replace it with. I've realized that it's okay to notice a woman's breasts or her gentle hands or her beautiful smile. But look at them in purity. God created every woman and every part of her, and He declared that His creation was "very good" (Gen. 1:31). As Scripture says, meditate on this goodness. Eventually, you will see that ALL women are beautiful creations--not just the size 0 models with which the media bombards us. I think most Christians define PURITY as "not lusting". Unfortunately, it's pretty difficult to meditate on that which is pure when it's a big negative. Thankfully, there is a positive aspect of purity--appreciating God's creation for the good thing it is. Look at all people as being "fearfully and wonderfully made" (Psa. 139:14), appreciating them for who they are. If you want to make a covenant with your eyes, don't stop at "not looking lustfully", but go even further to look in absolute purity. If you struggle with lust and sexual impurity (or any other sin), I highly recommend The Life That Wins. I also recommend dropping the works-based rituals in "Every Man's Battle" which will only bring you into bondage. Meditate on the goodness of God's creation, looking at all people with complete purity and holiness, and see if that doesn't bring you much greater freedom.
	Young to Old  Oct 3, 2008
I read Every Young Man's Battle and I wanted to get a deeper perspective, so I read this book. I must say it is a deeper perspective and has an interesting way of showing how bad sexual behavior affects everyone around you. Sulia Mason III, Abubakarr
	book review  Sep 12, 2008
This is a book that gets very detail into the sexual struggles that face men. There is no beating around the bush with this book, it is very direct and to the point as it lets you into the life of a man who struggled with this sin. Not recommended for teenagers, as there is also a book for them by this author.
	helpful with a negative slant  Jun 5, 2008
I think the authors have some really great ideas and it certainly drives the point home. But, from a Christen point of view, it denies an essential part of the emotion. For those Christen readers, read it for content not specifics.
	Worse than nothing  May 13, 2008
This book is probably the worst book on the subject of sexual temptation and addiction out there. They copy a lot of material from other authors (Carnes) but change it into something sanitized and useless. If you want to deal with anything beyond the symptoms of temptation or addiction then look elsewhere. Pat Carnes or Mark Laaser are the better choices.

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